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Merchant Ship Collective

Kids Call It Yapping. Adults Call It Doubt. It’s the Same Thing.

In education—and in life—we are constantly surrounded by voices. Some encourage. Some doubt. Some project their fears onto us. And some are just… yapping.

This week’s newsletter was inspired by the realest, wisest source I know: students. Kids will tell you the truth before the world has the chance to beat it out of them. They haven’t been worn down by stress, expectations, bills, failed relationships, career pressure, or other people’s opinions. Their clarity is raw. Their instinct is pure. Their mindset is naturally open.

And what I’ve learned from them is this:

The loudest people in your life are often the ones who never built the life you're trying to build.

Why You Shouldn’t Take Advice From People Who Aren’t Living the Life You Want

Across families, schools, and workplaces, there’s a pattern we don’t talk about enough:

People give advice from their limitations, not your possibilities.

Fear-based advice is still fear.
Discouragement—wrapped as “being realistic”—still crushes dreams.
And people who don’t believe in themselves rarely know how to believe in someone else.

Here are real statistics showing how far outside influence can pull people away from their true path:

• 48% of adults say their parents significantly influenced their career path.

• Nearly 40% report feeling pressured to follow that advice—even when it didn’t reflect who they were.

• Today, 52% of Americans are considering a career change, and 44% have already made one.

• Top reasons include the search for fulfillment, balance, and pursuing goals aligned with personal identity.

These numbers reveal a truth many adults learn too late:

If they had listened to their own voice sooner, their life would look different.

Students face the same push and pull—between instinct and outside pressure.
But the difference is: they haven’t yet learned to silence their dreams.

Adults often stop dreaming because they start listening to the wrong people.

Real-World Connection: Parenting, Growth, and the Voices We Choose to Hear

Parenthood changes everything about how you view influence.

You want your children to have a life better than the one you lived—to rise above what you endured, to access opportunities you never had, to see possibilities you weren’t shown.

But there’s a difference between guiding their path and placing your fears on it.

And I can admit this honestly:

There have been moments with my oldest son where I didn’t give him the best support. Not because I didn’t believe in him, but because I wanted to protect him from pain I experienced. I didn’t want him to fall the way I did. I didn’t want him to struggle the way I had.

But I’ve learned something powerful through him:

Our children don’t need us to limit their dreams—they need us to strengthen their wings.

He followed his own instincts.
He trusted his own voice.
He made decisions that were right for him—even when I didn’t fully understand them.

And I’m incredibly proud of him.

Watching him walk his own path has made me better for his younger brothers. It’s taught me how to apologize, how to listen better, how to offer guidance without overshadowing their inner compass, and how to check myself when fear tries to speak louder than faith.

Parents, teachers, and students—every one of us—is always learning.

And the greatest lesson my son has given me is this:

Believing in yourself is a skill you never stop learning.

Practical Tip: Filter the Voices in Your Life

Here’s a principle that will change your life:

Don’t take advice from someone whose life you wouldn’t trade places with.

Before you internalize someone’s words, ask:

1. Do they live with the character I respect?

2. Are they speaking from courage or fear?

3. Are they projecting limits or supporting potential?

4. If my child heard this advice, would I want them to follow it?

If not, it’s noise.
If yes, it’s wisdom.

You don’t owe anyone your dreams.
You don’t owe anyone your doubt.
You don’t owe anyone your potential.

You owe yourself the courage to grow.

Real-World Solution: The Three Filters Method

Before accepting someone’s input, filter it through:

1. Character:
Does this person live in a way I admire?

2. Courage:
Do they make decisions rooted in growth, not fear?

3. Credibility:
Have they ever built or pursued something similar to what I want?

If the answer to any of these is no, then their advice might be loud, emotional, persistent, or confident—but it is still yapping, not guidance.

Your future deserves clarity, not noise.

Reader Reflection Prompt

Think of one moment when someone’s fear-based advice held you back.
Now think of one moment when choosing your own voice moved you forward.

Which one felt like the authentic you?

And which one do you want to choose more often?

Scripture Spotlight

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”
— Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)

Your heart holds your dreams.
Your mind holds your calling.
Protect them—especially from the voices that don’t see what God placed inside you.

In solidarity,

Lyndsay LaBrier
Merchant Ship Collective
Education Catalyst — Helping educators, families, and students rise with clarity, courage, and purpose.

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References

Joblist. (2023). The impact of parental influence: Career edition.
https://www.joblist.com/trends/the-impact-of-parental-influence-career-edition

MyShortlister. (2024). Top career change statistics.
https://www.myshortlister.com/insights/career-change-statistics

NovoResume. (2024). Career change statistics.
https://novoresume.com/career-blog/career-change-statistics

Yeager, D. S., & Walton, G. M. (2011). Social-psychological interventions in education: They’re not magic. Review of Educational Research, 81(2), 267–301.